roller coaster

I’m like a roller coaster. That’s the nicest way I know to put it.  Some people go through seasons. I feel like I go through hours. I can start a day fueled with fire to change the world and by five o’clock wonder why the world would ever want anything I have to offer.

Thing is I’m really tough on me. If you screwed up I’d still know that you’re valuable because of Scriptures x, y and z. If I screwed up? Let’s forget about it. Pack it up. Show’s over. I don’t know why that is, I just know it’s me being me. And sometimes that can be really annoying.

It seems so silly. You would think that my constant run-ins with God’s grace would have settled into a definitive pattern of trust and peace. He’s faithfulness is certainly new every morning and His mercy rises with the sun.  The problem is that there are many days that I feel wholly undeserving of any of it.

But I know, like little orphan Annie, ‘the sun will come out tomorrow’. And I’m betting my bottom dollar that scripture is true when it says that God’s strength is made perfect in weakness. I’m one weaker brother that’s counting on His strength in more ways than one.